I love your story too! I hope you left your San Francisco politics back tperiod. So many blue city people who move to red areas act like "missionaries" who see themselves as enlightening the benighted, ignorant bumpkins and "racists."
Hello, First of all, I am not from San Francisco. That was an error from the FP headline writers. Second, to end all of the speculation in previous comments, I am not a liberal. That is why we are leaving California. Funny, that only one commenter suggested that possibility.
"The grasshopper ricocheted from the windshield smeared with its dead landsmen onto the collar of my wrinkled denim shirt and answered me in a throaty buzz.
Isn’t that the point?"
This. This!
Rarely something that I read is so perfect that I have to stop and put it down for a minute just to process it, and this was one of those times. Then, as a writer, curse the heavens that I never thought of it.
This is my favorite comment. That you would read so carefully, appreciate the position of the words, and comment is every writer's dream. Happy New Year. Here's to more fine writing for us all. Cheri
Back in 1964, Arthur C. Clark predicted that in the 21st century, modern communications would eliminate the need for cities, and that we would all be spread out. Why is this not happening? I know that I have relatives who think living in the city is the best (yes, for the conveniences), but nothing beats having a yard full of chickens and no neighbors close enough to hear my rooster. I think my favorite thing is getting snowed in, knowing that my dirt road is not worth the county's time to plow, thus allowing me to just relax.
I go to a cabin in the North woods of Minnesota every summer. I have been doing it for 50 years. It's remote. I am reminded by friends that Thoreau's mom was close enough by to do his laundry! Living remote makes you appreciate the niceties of city life. We have internet, and electricity now....but didn't from 1972-2019. Another reason a lot of these places are the way they are is people accept responsibility for their actions, and they vote Republican.
Must be refreshing having left flyover country. Having lived in Portland in Portland for 10 years during my mid-20's through 30's the thought of living in such a place again makes me nauseous.
I grew up in a small town, have lived on acreages in the country but have gradually moved inward to become a city mouse close to the center of Calgary, admittedly not SanFran (thank god).
There are great aspects of living in the country but I got tired of a long drive when you need a stick of gum or a teaspoon of sugar.
To each their own, glad you’re enjoying the country.
Wonderful! We welcome young people and also "bros". I find the emphasis on education, advocacy, and stewardship to be the magic triad. Infused with FUN throughout. Great article!
I grew up in a small town where from the elementary, the Jr. High and the High school you could see a corn field.
Wind blew just right, you can smell the hog farm that was a good 5 miles away as the crow flies.
As a teen, I wanted out of that small town and vowed to become a Big City boy!
Well, now I have been there and done that and now I am back in rural American with my own farm. Funny thing is, I have found rural America to be much friendlier than urban America. People around here wave, even if they dont know you. One winter, after getting a good snow fall, wife's car got stuck in the drive. There I was, single digit temps, trying to push her car out, when a young man driving by saw my predicament, turned around, came back and helped me push her out. I never met him before. So, yes, I get that "we just might need each other" mentality. But by some reason, there never was the breaking into a new community like pulling teeth. Maybe we just lucked into it.
There is a degree of inconvenience to rural living. Have to make most of trips to town. Never let the gas tank get below half. Always having a well stocked pantry, use one replace one and stock three deep.
The upside, wild ducks in the pond, wild turkeys at the wife bird feeders in the backyard, and the stars! The stars at night are so much different than in even a small town. The sound of the wind and the geese migrating in formation. Watching a doe and her fawn walking across the hill behind the house from the back deck.
Having lived through the same type of migration on my breakout from California to Colorado 30 years ago, because of me and all who have followed me, Colorado is no longer appealing in many regards. It has become more like the state I left. This is the other side of the coin.
I enjoyed hearing how you turned the unexpected inconvenience into a blessing. Sometimes we have a picture of how things will be or how we want them to be but, life always seems to have a lesson. Your description of growing stronger and your renewed appreciation for your body reminded me to be thankful as well.
I live in a small housing area, 500 hundred houses, in the country. Not isolated, but country none the less. When we first moved here there were maybe 250 houses. No street lights, no sidewalks, asphalt roads we pay a local company to snow plow. I could see the night sky. I didn't worry about vandalism or crime. Anyone who could even find the place couldn't see to do anything other than try to not run off the roads in the dark. People move here and then complain about all the above. They want sidewalks, ain't going to happen. Concrete streets. Where do we get that $10 million? Deer eat their flowers. Plant flowers deer don't like. Leave their outside lights on to deter crime. I can't see the night sky any more and all the lights do is show the bad guys the cars parked in the driveways, usually unlocked with purses, laptop etc in them. And people get surprised they got stolen. They knew what they were moving into prior to buying their house. Yet, they want live in the same suburban style they moved away from. The best one of all, some parts have restrictive covenants. But it's my land and I can with it as I please they say. No, whether you knew or not, when you bought that land/house, you said you would abide by the rules of the area. If you don't like them, buy an acreage. Or move to Montana. And if the bad guys find your well lit house one night, remember, we didn't have that problem until people started leaving their outside lights on all night.
I wish there was a blog or substack group that I could find that talks about this type of life transition. I am one of those who moved from Maryland to Texas. We were told by two financial advisors to move out of the state if we wanted to be lower middle-class. I remember as a child moving from Florida to Maryland and even as a child I thought “this is not a good place.” We talked about where we should go. A lot of places were just no (no more snows no more cold weather) eventually we landed in Texas and to say it was/is a culture shock is mildly putting it. Different politics, lots more religion, and yes we are in the boonies. It was what we could afford. While town is three miles away there are dollar stores, two feed stores, a ton of gas stations, a small town square, and for the most part genuinely nice people. When people asked where we came from they are surprised because they say we don’t act like we know it all and know better. I tell them that we moved because we know what is right and wrong and work from there. We are not here to change the city or county we currently reside in, it is up to us to adapt to Texas not vice versa. Yes things are different, one grocery store that is super expensive so we shop the next town over, we have a well, two dogs instead of one, a rancher as opposed to a two store cape cod. We are simply living a better life here and worried that outside influences will change the area for the worse. We have a border issue, water issues, housing is hard to come by, no apartments complexes (we have some apartments, but the are small and not convenient). We have learning that time and appointments work differently here. No electricians, no repair people, and word of mouth who works and shows up and who doesn’t.
Would I trade this to go back to Maryland, no. I adapt, Amazon has become a necessity, used clothing stores are gold mines, and we don’t need a lot. We just wished we had moved here earlier. We are in our 60’s and early 70s. This is our life now.
I love your story too! I hope you left your San Francisco politics back tperiod. So many blue city people who move to red areas act like "missionaries" who see themselves as enlightening the benighted, ignorant bumpkins and "racists."
Hello, First of all, I am not from San Francisco. That was an error from the FP headline writers. Second, to end all of the speculation in previous comments, I am not a liberal. That is why we are leaving California. Funny, that only one commenter suggested that possibility.
Loved your essay.
Thank you so much, Lee. It was fun to write.
I thought moving to Florida from NY was tough....but you definitely win that comparison...
"The grasshopper ricocheted from the windshield smeared with its dead landsmen onto the collar of my wrinkled denim shirt and answered me in a throaty buzz.
Isn’t that the point?"
This. This!
Rarely something that I read is so perfect that I have to stop and put it down for a minute just to process it, and this was one of those times. Then, as a writer, curse the heavens that I never thought of it.
Kate,
This is my favorite comment. That you would read so carefully, appreciate the position of the words, and comment is every writer's dream. Happy New Year. Here's to more fine writing for us all. Cheri
Back in 1964, Arthur C. Clark predicted that in the 21st century, modern communications would eliminate the need for cities, and that we would all be spread out. Why is this not happening? I know that I have relatives who think living in the city is the best (yes, for the conveniences), but nothing beats having a yard full of chickens and no neighbors close enough to hear my rooster. I think my favorite thing is getting snowed in, knowing that my dirt road is not worth the county's time to plow, thus allowing me to just relax.
Can't beat Thoreau.
I go to a cabin in the North woods of Minnesota every summer. I have been doing it for 50 years. It's remote. I am reminded by friends that Thoreau's mom was close enough by to do his laundry! Living remote makes you appreciate the niceties of city life. We have internet, and electricity now....but didn't from 1972-2019. Another reason a lot of these places are the way they are is people accept responsibility for their actions, and they vote Republican.
Must be refreshing having left flyover country. Having lived in Portland in Portland for 10 years during my mid-20's through 30's the thought of living in such a place again makes me nauseous.
I grew up in a small town, have lived on acreages in the country but have gradually moved inward to become a city mouse close to the center of Calgary, admittedly not SanFran (thank god).
There are great aspects of living in the country but I got tired of a long drive when you need a stick of gum or a teaspoon of sugar.
To each their own, glad you’re enjoying the country.
Moving to Montana?
You're not a dental floss tycoon, are you?
(I am wondering who will get the reference.)
moi!!!
Wonderful! We welcome young people and also "bros". I find the emphasis on education, advocacy, and stewardship to be the magic triad. Infused with FUN throughout. Great article!
Great story!
And I can relate!
I grew up in a small town where from the elementary, the Jr. High and the High school you could see a corn field.
Wind blew just right, you can smell the hog farm that was a good 5 miles away as the crow flies.
As a teen, I wanted out of that small town and vowed to become a Big City boy!
Well, now I have been there and done that and now I am back in rural American with my own farm. Funny thing is, I have found rural America to be much friendlier than urban America. People around here wave, even if they dont know you. One winter, after getting a good snow fall, wife's car got stuck in the drive. There I was, single digit temps, trying to push her car out, when a young man driving by saw my predicament, turned around, came back and helped me push her out. I never met him before. So, yes, I get that "we just might need each other" mentality. But by some reason, there never was the breaking into a new community like pulling teeth. Maybe we just lucked into it.
There is a degree of inconvenience to rural living. Have to make most of trips to town. Never let the gas tank get below half. Always having a well stocked pantry, use one replace one and stock three deep.
The upside, wild ducks in the pond, wild turkeys at the wife bird feeders in the backyard, and the stars! The stars at night are so much different than in even a small town. The sound of the wind and the geese migrating in formation. Watching a doe and her fawn walking across the hill behind the house from the back deck.
And, I dont have to lock my truck. ;)
Start writing!! This comment is sagacious! I loved reading it and all true. Strangers wave !
Having lived through the same type of migration on my breakout from California to Colorado 30 years ago, because of me and all who have followed me, Colorado is no longer appealing in many regards. It has become more like the state I left. This is the other side of the coin.
I enjoyed hearing how you turned the unexpected inconvenience into a blessing. Sometimes we have a picture of how things will be or how we want them to be but, life always seems to have a lesson. Your description of growing stronger and your renewed appreciation for your body reminded me to be thankful as well.
I live in a small housing area, 500 hundred houses, in the country. Not isolated, but country none the less. When we first moved here there were maybe 250 houses. No street lights, no sidewalks, asphalt roads we pay a local company to snow plow. I could see the night sky. I didn't worry about vandalism or crime. Anyone who could even find the place couldn't see to do anything other than try to not run off the roads in the dark. People move here and then complain about all the above. They want sidewalks, ain't going to happen. Concrete streets. Where do we get that $10 million? Deer eat their flowers. Plant flowers deer don't like. Leave their outside lights on to deter crime. I can't see the night sky any more and all the lights do is show the bad guys the cars parked in the driveways, usually unlocked with purses, laptop etc in them. And people get surprised they got stolen. They knew what they were moving into prior to buying their house. Yet, they want live in the same suburban style they moved away from. The best one of all, some parts have restrictive covenants. But it's my land and I can with it as I please they say. No, whether you knew or not, when you bought that land/house, you said you would abide by the rules of the area. If you don't like them, buy an acreage. Or move to Montana. And if the bad guys find your well lit house one night, remember, we didn't have that problem until people started leaving their outside lights on all night.
I wish there was a blog or substack group that I could find that talks about this type of life transition. I am one of those who moved from Maryland to Texas. We were told by two financial advisors to move out of the state if we wanted to be lower middle-class. I remember as a child moving from Florida to Maryland and even as a child I thought “this is not a good place.” We talked about where we should go. A lot of places were just no (no more snows no more cold weather) eventually we landed in Texas and to say it was/is a culture shock is mildly putting it. Different politics, lots more religion, and yes we are in the boonies. It was what we could afford. While town is three miles away there are dollar stores, two feed stores, a ton of gas stations, a small town square, and for the most part genuinely nice people. When people asked where we came from they are surprised because they say we don’t act like we know it all and know better. I tell them that we moved because we know what is right and wrong and work from there. We are not here to change the city or county we currently reside in, it is up to us to adapt to Texas not vice versa. Yes things are different, one grocery store that is super expensive so we shop the next town over, we have a well, two dogs instead of one, a rancher as opposed to a two store cape cod. We are simply living a better life here and worried that outside influences will change the area for the worse. We have a border issue, water issues, housing is hard to come by, no apartments complexes (we have some apartments, but the are small and not convenient). We have learning that time and appointments work differently here. No electricians, no repair people, and word of mouth who works and shows up and who doesn’t.
Would I trade this to go back to Maryland, no. I adapt, Amazon has become a necessity, used clothing stores are gold mines, and we don’t need a lot. We just wished we had moved here earlier. We are in our 60’s and early 70s. This is our life now.