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"We sought special educational needs support (we are British and live in UK) but were informed sending J to a specialist school was ‘clearly and obviously a life style choice for a middle class family’"

Who exactly said this and why did you apparently pay attention to, or have to pay attention to, them?

More widely, paying attention to malevolent idiots is in large part why Britain is a basket case of a multi-national state. We ought to pay less attention to malevolent idiots.

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