Of all the regrets of my long life the biggest are my two divorces and the damage done to four truly loving and forgiving children. Mostly my fault and I've tried to make it up to them and their mothers. Four divorces is not an "achievement" to be celebrated. Sorry if that sounds judgmental but try to remember that life is a marathon, no…
Of all the regrets of my long life the biggest are my two divorces and the damage done to four truly loving and forgiving children. Mostly my fault and I've tried to make it up to them and their mothers. Four divorces is not an "achievement" to be celebrated. Sorry if that sounds judgmental but try to remember that life is a marathon, not a sprint and there are moments of anger and emptiness that will pass in any relationship. Sure, there are people who just shouldn't be married. But if you decide to have children they have to be your primary focus, rather than your evanescent "happiness." My two cents for what it's worth.
I’m the author’s stepson and the son of his fifth wife, Ilene.
This comment isn't at you, specifically, rather it just seemed like it'd be seen the most if I commented it as a reply to you, instead of somewhere far down below in the mass of threads.
Anyway, I hope that Ilene is his Jonathan's last wife, though his past would indicate otherwise.
First off, I’m super proud of Jonathan for getting this piece published.
TFP is an awesome place — for all the authors who were fortunate enough to get featured, well done. My personal fave is the one by Ruby LaRoca, 17. She made me feel incredibly dumb because at 17, I was busy skipping class to go snowboarding, which is even more embarrassing because I’m terrible at most sports, but especially the ones where it hurts when you fall.
Anyway, I read a bunch of the comments on this piece, and doing so made me feel like I should comment, especially because one comment said “You should ask each of your children and ex-wives to rewrite this story from their perspectives. Now that would be an interesting read. This was not.”
Now, I’m not here to defend Jonathan.
My family doesn’t do that.
We don’t support saving our kin from the hardships that come with having to interact with the mob. Life is hard. There will always be someone miserable who feels like yelling at you.
But I was a bit shocked.
To the kind comments, great. The piece is, after all, about a dude who sucked at dating for a very long time, and then finally figured it out (at least…I hope that’s the case, because my mother is a lot to handle, and even now, I can’t imagine if she were single again).
I pray they stay married until she dies.
But a bunch of the comments were not kind.
Vicious attacks that seemed to stem from what I can only interpret as insecurity. People who villainized the author for divulging the fact that he had screwed up.
Comments that would not be strange to me if this was, let’s say TikTok or Reddit, but I was surprised because I typically interpret TFP to be an audience of people who are open to hearing about journeys of imperfection, rather than what I read the majority of the negative comments to be, which were: “How dare a man be such a bad husband to all of these women.” And “Oh my god, he must be a terrible person for not putting the kids’ happiness before his own. What a monster.”
I guess I just fundamentally disagree with these comments, and yes, I’m doing my best to be unbiased here and ignore the fact that I’m related to, albeit via paperwork, the author.
I think life is short, and we all make choices and deal with the consequences.
But we are not here to judge the actions of others.
After all, if any of us had been born into the same human experience with the same set of circumstances, would we not act the same as the author did?
And should we not be empathetic and congratulate a stranger for acknowledging their mistakes?
I guess I just wonder where all the “nuclear family or bust” + “this man is evil” comments are coming from, and my best label for their genesis is that schadenfreude is unfortunately real.
Hey, I mean, as someone who is happily engaged, after having built a project management system to better vet and then cull the dudes I was dating, I have no problem with the fact that Jonathan was married 5 times. I don’t even care if that number had been 10.
What matters to me is that the author is now happier than they were before, and for all we know, my mother would have never married the version of the author who had been meek enough to push his own needs aside and stick it out through marriages 1-4.
I don’t know that my mother would be attracted to someone like that. I don’t think I would be either.
I think you should stay together for the kids if you want to stay together for the kids. And if you don’t want to, you shouldn’t.
If you’re not happily married to the person you’re with, the things most likely keeping you stuck are fear coupled with an inability to be alone.
So, yeah.
To everyone who is strong enough to put themselves first, congrats on having a higher probability of finding happiness.
I know plenty of people whose quest for personal happiness leaves a trail of destruction behind them. I have spent most of my life helping to clean up the damage done by other people.
There are times when divorce is best for the children. Sometimes a responsible parent needs to rescue their kids from an abuser, for example. Or one parent develops a mental illness that leaves them erratic to the point of being unsafe.
But abandoning a marriage for trivial reasons sends a very clear message to the kids: "you don't matter".
If the divorce isn't FOR the kids, then wait until the kids are grown.
Idk. I’m so happy my parents got divorced. How lucky was I to watch two people who weren’t in love show me that it’s possible to find love again rather than just play house in some sort of sterile partnership.
I can't help but think that couples who are thinking of having children get all of the interpersonal issues identified and resolved BEFORE the first pregnancy, not after the kid is borne
Tragically, too many people use their kids as pawns, rooks, bishops, knights, or queens in the process of divorce....
I didn't, at all. As you correctly observed, Boomers are self-absorbed and I often wonder how we got this way. Too many selfish nostrums and theories prescribed? Parents who struggled with war and depression hellbent on making our lives easier than theirs were? The endless opportunities of the 50s and 60s? The equally endless hedonistic bs? Not sure. But we can maybe try to stop being so selfish and start sharing the bounty we were given with those who are waiting in the wings?
My parents were Greatest Gen, but they could not have children of their own; they adopted me when they were in their 40s.
I consider myself very fortunate that my parents had the time to observe the mistakes of other parents of their generation before they raised me. But being aware of the privations they grew up with made it clear to me WHY that generation wanted their children to have life easier than they did.
I often wonder what I would do, if in my early 20s at a December pro football game in New York City, my world were turned upside down by the PA announcement of the attack on Pearl Harbor. Four months later, my dad was on in a jungle hellhole called Guadalcanal. When I tried to enlist in another war half a world away, having just turned 17, he wouldn't sign the necessary papers. He never spoke about his service but I'm sure he wanted a better life for us - and he was adamant it meant not one fighting in another jungle. My regret. Not his.
Regrets are a funny thing as they hold an ever tugging reminder featuring ‘if only’ scenarios. Imagine having the chance to revisit regrets, how would that play out?
Yes the children were really lost a little bit in this saga. A friend of mine is currently pontificating divorce, for reasons that truly aren’t that great. She has 2 very young children. Meanwhile, I just listened to the interview of the author who outlined that the greatest privilege a child can have is being raised in a 2 parent household - these are the children, when adjusted for race and class, have the greatest economic, educational, and societal outcomes in life. My view is that when you choose to become a parent, your happiness is no longer the priority. Mothers seem to grasp this concept better than fathers - there are no single dads. I know that’s a controversial statement, but statistically speaking it’s true. Over 80% of children living with a single parent are with their mothers. There are many reasons for this, but one has to be, mothers feel in their core that their duty is to stay with their children. Men seem generally to survive the separation from their children more or less unscathed.
Dasha, I agree, “mothers feel in their core that their duty is to stay with their children.” divorced mothers tend to be remain divorced longer than their ex-husbands.
My ex married a year after he walked out; moved 1200 miles away and I had our three kiddos under 11. He married his assistant 13 months later (and only 7 mos after the paper work was complete). My second husband and I married 4.5 years after we met.
It’s been a tough road as a blended military family of 8; with two narcissistic people as exes- but as a Christian family he and I have prevailed in being a cornerstone of faith and commitment. His ex is on her 4th marriage.
Divorce with children is devastating for decades to come. It causes a non- natural family dynamic. It is also financially penalizing and emotionally taxing.
The biggest problem is people see marriage as a business deal; and not a lifetime covenant. There is no “perfect” person; no “soul mate “ or any other dribble people claim to need. Commitment is a commitment. The author was obviously a cheater. You don’t “fall in love” while you are married unless you are looking too.
Please. I’m sure there were plenty of other non- self absorbed essays that could have shed light on life
I agree, this guy almost certainly cheated on his first wife. Then he didn't treat the second how she wanted to be treated..... Then he meets #4 ~8 weeks after he left #3..... Talk about moving fast.
Single dad here! I know many other single fathers as well. Pls reconsider your assumption above ("there are no single dads") - respectfully, you are factually incorrect not to mention dismissive of a lot of men who have put their children's happiness far above their own 'freedom'. Being a single dad to my children was a gift. I am grateful for the opportunity to have been there for them when they needed it, and I wouldn't trade that experience for anything.
You’re the exception, and that’s wonderful. But statistically you are outweighed by single mothers by more than 4 to 1. I have no comment on your experience other than any parent who acknowledges that their role to raise and love the children they choose to have is doing the most difficult and the most right thing. Your kids are lucky to have you. But the vast majority of single parents are mothers (>80%). You may know some single fathers. I know none. But I know many single moms. And I am willing to bet most people have the same sphere of knowledge. Why that is, I postulate is based in biology and evolution, but that would be conjecture.
And ps - I am not dismissive whatsoever. You are a wonderful parent, and so are all the fathers who take on an active and loving role. As my 2 year old would say, you’re “good jobbing”
Hmmm, after my mother divorced my father because she was unhappy and needed to 'find herself', I was raised by a terrific single dad. My mother was still very much in my life, but I think there was a time there, where because of women's greater involvement in the workplace and feminism, that women were more encouraged to disengage from men, from their families and to seek happiness for themselves.
And it may be that the vast majority of single parents are women, but I believe a majority of those single moms were never married to begin with, rather than victims of husbands who just took off and disappeared.
When moms abandon their children in the first 9 months we call it abortion. A dad taking off in that time period isn't necessarily fatal for the child. The comparison point should be moms vs dads who take off after age 2 or so. I have known both.
Yes, mothers abandon their children, and sometimes those children are raised by single fathers.
If abortion is included in the numbers for abandonment, the numbers for women abandoning their children go up substantially. That's the accurate comparison point for people who said, from the moment of conception: "nope, not gonna be a parent." There are roughly 204 abortions for every 1000 live births, so about 1/6 of mothers do abandon their children shortly after conception. I can't find information on what percentage of dads abandon their children shortly after conception. It might be higher, but I'm not sure it's a LOT higher.
We are going on fifty years. A very easy fifty years because we are equally yoked sober and responsible people. Additionally I know what an oath means. Boomers are disastrously self absorbed.
My wife and I are also in our 50th year of marriage. We have two great kids and a wonderful two-year-old grandson. I can't imagine being married five times but am glad things finally worked out for Jonathan.
Okay, I will add to the sharing; my years married, 46 good years and we continue to agree to disagree and when we find agreement we laugh in disbelief.
We're going on 38 years. Ours has not been easy, but it has only been possible because we are, as you say, equally yoked. I chose my husband because he had the same commitments in life that I did. Our struggles have not been outside forces, but rather due to challenges of our ability to be adequately kind to each other.
"The ability to be kind." If only I'd learned that sooner. To be slow with the snappy retort and to learn to win by losing not lose by winning an argument but creating a hurt that didn't heal.
Words. It seems words hurt women in ways they don't men. My mother and her mother put up with sharp tongued men who were otherwise good. I'm an asshole like that but seldom with my bride. We often were three generational households
and could easily be again.
You can learn much from your mother if you're humble enough.
Celia that's a huge part of it. My ringtone for her phone is "Still the one" by Orleans. Sappy. I know. The point is she is. My friends make fun of that. The same friends who have gone through multiple marriages.
Forgive yourself and move forward. None of us come out of this life unscathed. You do not have to be perfect to be a good parent, you just have to keep showing up! And the stories we tell ourselves matter, too, so divorce does not need to be looked at as a failure or an achievement, merely a lesson.
How gallant of you! Easy peasy. Just a lesson. The man just posted a self reflection of tremendous gravitas requiring a serious sense of self-appraisal. One that very few can arrive at. Your comment is the exact opposite of his message.
I saw that movie where the girl told the guy that “life is a marathon, not a sprint”, although I don’t remember the name of the movie. But it is a great line! 🙂
Thanks but not particularly brave. Perhaps more rueful and the product of long, hard, honest discussions with the loving, forgiving adults I was fortunate to have fathered. At least my devotion to them never wavered and it mattered.
It was brave. Everyone can fall down. In their lives and make terrible mistakes. Here’s to hoping that you can forgive yourself as much as you are asking those who love you to forgive you.
Of all the regrets of my long life the biggest are my two divorces and the damage done to four truly loving and forgiving children. Mostly my fault and I've tried to make it up to them and their mothers. Four divorces is not an "achievement" to be celebrated. Sorry if that sounds judgmental but try to remember that life is a marathon, not a sprint and there are moments of anger and emptiness that will pass in any relationship. Sure, there are people who just shouldn't be married. But if you decide to have children they have to be your primary focus, rather than your evanescent "happiness." My two cents for what it's worth.
Hi Bruce.
I’m the author’s stepson and the son of his fifth wife, Ilene.
This comment isn't at you, specifically, rather it just seemed like it'd be seen the most if I commented it as a reply to you, instead of somewhere far down below in the mass of threads.
Anyway, I hope that Ilene is his Jonathan's last wife, though his past would indicate otherwise.
First off, I’m super proud of Jonathan for getting this piece published.
TFP is an awesome place — for all the authors who were fortunate enough to get featured, well done. My personal fave is the one by Ruby LaRoca, 17. She made me feel incredibly dumb because at 17, I was busy skipping class to go snowboarding, which is even more embarrassing because I’m terrible at most sports, but especially the ones where it hurts when you fall.
Anyway, I read a bunch of the comments on this piece, and doing so made me feel like I should comment, especially because one comment said “You should ask each of your children and ex-wives to rewrite this story from their perspectives. Now that would be an interesting read. This was not.”
Now, I’m not here to defend Jonathan.
My family doesn’t do that.
We don’t support saving our kin from the hardships that come with having to interact with the mob. Life is hard. There will always be someone miserable who feels like yelling at you.
But I was a bit shocked.
To the kind comments, great. The piece is, after all, about a dude who sucked at dating for a very long time, and then finally figured it out (at least…I hope that’s the case, because my mother is a lot to handle, and even now, I can’t imagine if she were single again).
I pray they stay married until she dies.
But a bunch of the comments were not kind.
Vicious attacks that seemed to stem from what I can only interpret as insecurity. People who villainized the author for divulging the fact that he had screwed up.
Comments that would not be strange to me if this was, let’s say TikTok or Reddit, but I was surprised because I typically interpret TFP to be an audience of people who are open to hearing about journeys of imperfection, rather than what I read the majority of the negative comments to be, which were: “How dare a man be such a bad husband to all of these women.” And “Oh my god, he must be a terrible person for not putting the kids’ happiness before his own. What a monster.”
I guess I just fundamentally disagree with these comments, and yes, I’m doing my best to be unbiased here and ignore the fact that I’m related to, albeit via paperwork, the author.
I think life is short, and we all make choices and deal with the consequences.
But we are not here to judge the actions of others.
After all, if any of us had been born into the same human experience with the same set of circumstances, would we not act the same as the author did?
And should we not be empathetic and congratulate a stranger for acknowledging their mistakes?
I guess I just wonder where all the “nuclear family or bust” + “this man is evil” comments are coming from, and my best label for their genesis is that schadenfreude is unfortunately real.
Hey, I mean, as someone who is happily engaged, after having built a project management system to better vet and then cull the dudes I was dating, I have no problem with the fact that Jonathan was married 5 times. I don’t even care if that number had been 10.
What matters to me is that the author is now happier than they were before, and for all we know, my mother would have never married the version of the author who had been meek enough to push his own needs aside and stick it out through marriages 1-4.
I don’t know that my mother would be attracted to someone like that. I don’t think I would be either.
I think you should stay together for the kids if you want to stay together for the kids. And if you don’t want to, you shouldn’t.
If you’re not happily married to the person you’re with, the things most likely keeping you stuck are fear coupled with an inability to be alone.
So, yeah.
To everyone who is strong enough to put themselves first, congrats on having a higher probability of finding happiness.
And to the rest of the commenters, good luck.
I know plenty of people whose quest for personal happiness leaves a trail of destruction behind them. I have spent most of my life helping to clean up the damage done by other people.
There are times when divorce is best for the children. Sometimes a responsible parent needs to rescue their kids from an abuser, for example. Or one parent develops a mental illness that leaves them erratic to the point of being unsafe.
But abandoning a marriage for trivial reasons sends a very clear message to the kids: "you don't matter".
If the divorce isn't FOR the kids, then wait until the kids are grown.
Idk. I’m so happy my parents got divorced. How lucky was I to watch two people who weren’t in love show me that it’s possible to find love again rather than just play house in some sort of sterile partnership.
Thank you for this very adult comment. More married people should heed your message.
Bruce, regrets are our teachers and you have learned much.
Bruce, I don’t think the essay was submitted and published to in order to have his life judged.
Perhaps. But everything submitted to the FP is up for grabs. That's the way it works here.
Yes, I am discovering that’s the way it works here. 😂
I can't help but think that couples who are thinking of having children get all of the interpersonal issues identified and resolved BEFORE the first pregnancy, not after the kid is borne
Tragically, too many people use their kids as pawns, rooks, bishops, knights, or queens in the process of divorce....
I don’t think any of us get all of
Our interpersonal issues sorted ever. Life is hard.
Bruce please don't read my comments as ragging on you. Please see these as a short open barreled 12ga with my eyes closed approach.
I didn't, at all. As you correctly observed, Boomers are self-absorbed and I often wonder how we got this way. Too many selfish nostrums and theories prescribed? Parents who struggled with war and depression hellbent on making our lives easier than theirs were? The endless opportunities of the 50s and 60s? The equally endless hedonistic bs? Not sure. But we can maybe try to stop being so selfish and start sharing the bounty we were given with those who are waiting in the wings?
My parents were Greatest Gen, but they could not have children of their own; they adopted me when they were in their 40s.
I consider myself very fortunate that my parents had the time to observe the mistakes of other parents of their generation before they raised me. But being aware of the privations they grew up with made it clear to me WHY that generation wanted their children to have life easier than they did.
It was a mistake to try to make it too easy.
I often wonder what I would do, if in my early 20s at a December pro football game in New York City, my world were turned upside down by the PA announcement of the attack on Pearl Harbor. Four months later, my dad was on in a jungle hellhole called Guadalcanal. When I tried to enlist in another war half a world away, having just turned 17, he wouldn't sign the necessary papers. He never spoke about his service but I'm sure he wanted a better life for us - and he was adamant it meant not one fighting in another jungle. My regret. Not his.
Regrets are a funny thing as they hold an ever tugging reminder featuring ‘if only’ scenarios. Imagine having the chance to revisit regrets, how would that play out?
This is an open question, not specific to Bruce.
Yes the children were really lost a little bit in this saga. A friend of mine is currently pontificating divorce, for reasons that truly aren’t that great. She has 2 very young children. Meanwhile, I just listened to the interview of the author who outlined that the greatest privilege a child can have is being raised in a 2 parent household - these are the children, when adjusted for race and class, have the greatest economic, educational, and societal outcomes in life. My view is that when you choose to become a parent, your happiness is no longer the priority. Mothers seem to grasp this concept better than fathers - there are no single dads. I know that’s a controversial statement, but statistically speaking it’s true. Over 80% of children living with a single parent are with their mothers. There are many reasons for this, but one has to be, mothers feel in their core that their duty is to stay with their children. Men seem generally to survive the separation from their children more or less unscathed.
Dasha, I agree, “mothers feel in their core that their duty is to stay with their children.” divorced mothers tend to be remain divorced longer than their ex-husbands.
My ex married a year after he walked out; moved 1200 miles away and I had our three kiddos under 11. He married his assistant 13 months later (and only 7 mos after the paper work was complete). My second husband and I married 4.5 years after we met.
It’s been a tough road as a blended military family of 8; with two narcissistic people as exes- but as a Christian family he and I have prevailed in being a cornerstone of faith and commitment. His ex is on her 4th marriage.
Divorce with children is devastating for decades to come. It causes a non- natural family dynamic. It is also financially penalizing and emotionally taxing.
The biggest problem is people see marriage as a business deal; and not a lifetime covenant. There is no “perfect” person; no “soul mate “ or any other dribble people claim to need. Commitment is a commitment. The author was obviously a cheater. You don’t “fall in love” while you are married unless you are looking too.
Please. I’m sure there were plenty of other non- self absorbed essays that could have shed light on life
Than another I “deserved” blah blah blah.
I agree, this guy almost certainly cheated on his first wife. Then he didn't treat the second how she wanted to be treated..... Then he meets #4 ~8 weeks after he left #3..... Talk about moving fast.
Single dad here! I know many other single fathers as well. Pls reconsider your assumption above ("there are no single dads") - respectfully, you are factually incorrect not to mention dismissive of a lot of men who have put their children's happiness far above their own 'freedom'. Being a single dad to my children was a gift. I am grateful for the opportunity to have been there for them when they needed it, and I wouldn't trade that experience for anything.
Oops, Paul, you might call me out on my comment on divorced men. My “data” on this is based on divorced friends.
You’re the exception, and that’s wonderful. But statistically you are outweighed by single mothers by more than 4 to 1. I have no comment on your experience other than any parent who acknowledges that their role to raise and love the children they choose to have is doing the most difficult and the most right thing. Your kids are lucky to have you. But the vast majority of single parents are mothers (>80%). You may know some single fathers. I know none. But I know many single moms. And I am willing to bet most people have the same sphere of knowledge. Why that is, I postulate is based in biology and evolution, but that would be conjecture.
Citation: https://www.singleparentproject.org/single-parent-statistics
And ps - I am not dismissive whatsoever. You are a wonderful parent, and so are all the fathers who take on an active and loving role. As my 2 year old would say, you’re “good jobbing”
Hmmm, after my mother divorced my father because she was unhappy and needed to 'find herself', I was raised by a terrific single dad. My mother was still very much in my life, but I think there was a time there, where because of women's greater involvement in the workplace and feminism, that women were more encouraged to disengage from men, from their families and to seek happiness for themselves.
And it may be that the vast majority of single parents are women, but I believe a majority of those single moms were never married to begin with, rather than victims of husbands who just took off and disappeared.
Well yes, by single mom I mean no dad, not no husband. The dad took off.
When moms abandon their children in the first 9 months we call it abortion. A dad taking off in that time period isn't necessarily fatal for the child. The comparison point should be moms vs dads who take off after age 2 or so. I have known both.
Yes, mothers abandon their children, and sometimes those children are raised by single fathers.
Yes but my point is statistically, dads do this far, far more often. By a not insignificant amount.
If abortion is included in the numbers for abandonment, the numbers for women abandoning their children go up substantially. That's the accurate comparison point for people who said, from the moment of conception: "nope, not gonna be a parent." There are roughly 204 abortions for every 1000 live births, so about 1/6 of mothers do abandon their children shortly after conception. I can't find information on what percentage of dads abandon their children shortly after conception. It might be higher, but I'm not sure it's a LOT higher.
We are going on fifty years. A very easy fifty years because we are equally yoked sober and responsible people. Additionally I know what an oath means. Boomers are disastrously self absorbed.
My wife and I are also in our 50th year of marriage. We have two great kids and a wonderful two-year-old grandson. I can't imagine being married five times but am glad things finally worked out for Jonathan.
Okay, I will add to the sharing; my years married, 46 good years and we continue to agree to disagree and when we find agreement we laugh in disbelief.
We're going on 38 years. Ours has not been easy, but it has only been possible because we are, as you say, equally yoked. I chose my husband because he had the same commitments in life that I did. Our struggles have not been outside forces, but rather due to challenges of our ability to be adequately kind to each other.
"The ability to be kind." If only I'd learned that sooner. To be slow with the snappy retort and to learn to win by losing not lose by winning an argument but creating a hurt that didn't heal.
Very wise words, Bruce.
Thanks Shane. Happy New Year to you .
And you, Bruce,
Words. It seems words hurt women in ways they don't men. My mother and her mother put up with sharp tongued men who were otherwise good. I'm an asshole like that but seldom with my bride. We often were three generational households
and could easily be again.
You can learn much from your mother if you're humble enough.
Celia that's a huge part of it. My ringtone for her phone is "Still the one" by Orleans. Sappy. I know. The point is she is. My friends make fun of that. The same friends who have gone through multiple marriages.
Forgive yourself and move forward. None of us come out of this life unscathed. You do not have to be perfect to be a good parent, you just have to keep showing up! And the stories we tell ourselves matter, too, so divorce does not need to be looked at as a failure or an achievement, merely a lesson.
How gallant of you! Easy peasy. Just a lesson. The man just posted a self reflection of tremendous gravitas requiring a serious sense of self-appraisal. One that very few can arrive at. Your comment is the exact opposite of his message.
Why are you pissing in Emily’s cornflakes? She wrote from the heart and it was sincere. Bruce liked what she wrote. Why spoil it with this?
Whatever you say, Puer aeternus.
All is forgiven now that you spoke furren! Now, if you'd just pissed on Bruce's shoes, I'd laugh and say, Well Done :-)
Woody Allen said, "80% of success is showing up."
Emily, that was a whole lot of kindness!
Keep showing up, Amen!
Thanks Emily. You sound like a forgiving soul.
I saw that movie where the girl told the guy that “life is a marathon, not a sprint”, although I don’t remember the name of the movie. But it is a great line! 🙂
Here's another. "That's why we play eighteen holes".
Still. We're responsible. "Never mind the bollocks."
Well said.
Thanks Lynne. I've always valued your opinion and honesty.
And I yours.
A brave realization to post
Thanks but not particularly brave. Perhaps more rueful and the product of long, hard, honest discussions with the loving, forgiving adults I was fortunate to have fathered. At least my devotion to them never wavered and it mattered.
It seems your kids have forgiven you because your devotion to them never wavered; they did not feel abandoned.
It was brave. Everyone can fall down. In their lives and make terrible mistakes. Here’s to hoping that you can forgive yourself as much as you are asking those who love you to forgive you.
Well said, Simon.
Thanks Simon. Much appreciated.