I was an anxious teen before it was cool, and I've raised two kids on the autism spectrum into healthy adulthood in spite of it all.
First, River, personal advice for you. Look at a person's cheekbones, not their eyes. It's more comfortable for both of you, and it's close enough to looking them in the eye that it counts.
I was an anxious teen before it was cool, and I've raised two kids on the autism spectrum into healthy adulthood in spite of it all.
First, River, personal advice for you. Look at a person's cheekbones, not their eyes. It's more comfortable for both of you, and it's close enough to looking them in the eye that it counts.
Second, the Mental Health Industrial Complex thrives on dysfunction, and, therefore, to survive, it must perpetuate dysfunction. The labels for every last little nuance of humanity promote focus on dysfunction and, therefore, perpetuate it. Ka-Ching!
Third, never underestimate the self-serving nature of school systems and their superfluous bureaucrats. So many times teachers tried to get me to slap a label on my son so they could get extra funding. For example, when he was seven, we got, "We don't really think your son need Special Education, but if you'll sign here, that will allow our own school psychologist to do the testing herself." That was a hard NO from me. My son was not a typical student, but he was definitely not special ed. Now? That "Special Ed" kid is set to go into a Robotics Engineering masters program next semester. His teachers would have been perfectly happy to let the Special Ed label severely limit his paths in life in order to make their own lives more convenient. FOLLOW THE MONEY.
Fourth, everyone is a head case. Everyone. We must be taught how to be strong and to handle life in spite of our issues, not to label them and wallow in them ad nauseam. Address them, accept them, compensate for them, put them in your navel and contemplate them occasionally, but never, never make them the focus of life. We are not our labels.
All the labels only give kids permission to focus on the "can't," and kids should never be told they can't anything. They and the adults in their lives should only focus on what they CAN do.
You were brave to share this, River. Ditch the labels. Embrace the fact that at the end of the day, the only real label is "human," with all of the imperfections that come with that. And that's okay. Good luck!
Exactly! "...everyone is a head case. Everyone. We must be taught how to be strong and to handle life in spite of our issues, not to label them and wallow in them ad nauseam."
I was an anxious teen before it was cool, and I've raised two kids on the autism spectrum into healthy adulthood in spite of it all.
First, River, personal advice for you. Look at a person's cheekbones, not their eyes. It's more comfortable for both of you, and it's close enough to looking them in the eye that it counts.
Second, the Mental Health Industrial Complex thrives on dysfunction, and, therefore, to survive, it must perpetuate dysfunction. The labels for every last little nuance of humanity promote focus on dysfunction and, therefore, perpetuate it. Ka-Ching!
Third, never underestimate the self-serving nature of school systems and their superfluous bureaucrats. So many times teachers tried to get me to slap a label on my son so they could get extra funding. For example, when he was seven, we got, "We don't really think your son need Special Education, but if you'll sign here, that will allow our own school psychologist to do the testing herself." That was a hard NO from me. My son was not a typical student, but he was definitely not special ed. Now? That "Special Ed" kid is set to go into a Robotics Engineering masters program next semester. His teachers would have been perfectly happy to let the Special Ed label severely limit his paths in life in order to make their own lives more convenient. FOLLOW THE MONEY.
Fourth, everyone is a head case. Everyone. We must be taught how to be strong and to handle life in spite of our issues, not to label them and wallow in them ad nauseam. Address them, accept them, compensate for them, put them in your navel and contemplate them occasionally, but never, never make them the focus of life. We are not our labels.
All the labels only give kids permission to focus on the "can't," and kids should never be told they can't anything. They and the adults in their lives should only focus on what they CAN do.
You were brave to share this, River. Ditch the labels. Embrace the fact that at the end of the day, the only real label is "human," with all of the imperfections that come with that. And that's okay. Good luck!
Exactly! "...everyone is a head case. Everyone. We must be taught how to be strong and to handle life in spite of our issues, not to label them and wallow in them ad nauseam."